Many parents or caretakers do not realize that sharing and teamwork can actually be reinforced and learned based on numerous research studies.  Teaching your children to work as a team and to share will reduce the behavior problem frequency in the future that the parent will have to address in the home and at school! The following are some ideas on how to encourage these skills. 
1.  One idea is to reward your children for working or playing with no tantrum or behavior problems. For example, if they are playing a game give social praise or a snack only on days they work together or play nicely! 
2. Practice giving the something and telling them they can have that item  (such as a cookie) only if they share it with their siblings.
3.  Encourage children to take turns playing with a toy when they both want to play with it.  You might even suggest they discuss it and come to some agreement about the use of the toy.
4.  Purchase stories  that include the theme of sharing or teamwork and discuss the story after reading it together.
5.  Point out to your children when other people display team or sharing skills. For example, if someone picks up something that someone drops compliment the action by saying " wow what a gentleman he helped that woman!" 
6.  In the evening roleplay and discuss how people work together or play together at school or in the community. 
7.  Play alot of games with your children and focus on good sportsmanship, complimenting each other on playing skills, taking turns, talking nicely to each other and manners. Praise these skills when the occur during the game!
Developing these social skills of teamwork and sharing will probalby lead to many happy experiences when your child is with another person or a group and a happier life! 

There are several factors to consider in choosing what programs to buy for your child. This is an important decision since the type of things your child spends his time using on the computer may determine what he learns and ultimately how he progress in school and with his social skills with others. The following is a list of factors you should think about before making a purchase.
1.  First you should decide whether you want a game or an educational program.
2. If you choose a game then consider the content of the game. Violent games may encourage violent behavior. Games with moral content may encourage moral behavior. Keep in mind that the type of game may effect your child' behavior.
3.  Consider the level of the game whether it is designed for your child's age group. Remember to consider if your child is smarter then most children you may want a game designed for an older age group so he does not get bored with the game. If your child is not learning quickly and his skills are generally lower then his age group you may consider programs designed for kids of a lower age group.
4.  Consider whether the game contains characters or topics of interest to your particular child. For example if your child likes the character Dora you may want to buy games that have Dora included!
5.  Visibility of the game may be important. If your child is color blind a game which uses a lot of colors may not be helpful to him. If the game has a lot of writing and subtitles and your child cannot yet read it may not be good for him. Generally, children that cannot yet read may respond with more elaborate and colorful games then a child that can read. Similarly, if the child cannot hear well then more visual pictures in the program may be more effective for him. 
6.  If you choose an educational game or other games it is important to check whether the authors describe research that confirms that the child will learn for the game. For example, there is a game called "Head Sprout"(recently purchased by another company)  that does have research that confirms that the children do learn to read from using the program. Games that have been scientifically validated to use psychological principles that are effective are the games to choose for your child! 
7.  Always consider the child's preferences before making a final decision discuss the options or even show him the games to get his input and assure that he will like the game. 
8.  Try to select games that include some reinforcer after correct performance if possible within the game! 
Generally, the most important factor is to choose games that are validated to be effective. Secondly, to choose games that match your child's individual needs. 

Parents or caregivers often ask " How do I get my children to help with chores!" The following are some tips to encourage them and motivate them to complete chores in the home. 
1.  Discuss reasons why it is important to do chores. For example, so that the house looks nice when their friends come over. A second reason might be to help the parent or caregiver so they have more time to cook for the child or go places with them. 
2.  It is helpful to make a list of possible chores and have the child choose a specific number that they would like to do. If the child enjoys the chore intrinsically he will be more likely to perform the chore. 
3.  A list of reinforcers that the child would like to earn weekly or daily for performing the chore can be useful. It is helpful to involve the child or observe him closely to make sure the reinforcers selected are actually going to motivate the child. For example, a child that does not like music will not be motivated by earning music tapes. 
4.  Making a daily schedule with the time the chores will be performed is helpful so that it becomes a rountine for the child.
5.  Make sure all the children in the household are participating in chores so that no child feels he is doing more than he should be. 
6. Finally, social praise and excitement about the chore by the caregiver can always helps strengthen the probablity that the child will continue to help out!  Try to use an excited voice, be specific about the childs positive character within the praise and specific about the chore that you are happy with. 
The above tips will increase the enjoyment of the chores and the likelihood that they will perform chores! 

Thanksgiving can be a time of stress or a time to be close and happy with your family. To make sure the dinner is the later prepare your child for the dinner! The following are some suggestions to make things go more smoothly and prevent behavior problems. 

1. Before thanksgiving involve the child with stories, activities and discussions about thanksgiving and what it means generally.
2.  Review the schedule with your child about what will occur thanksgiving day and what reinforcers you will have scheduled for him/her for good behavior that day.
3.  Make sure to ask the child what reinforcers they would prefer or give them a choice (menu) of different reinforcers. 
4.  Review what reinforcers are chosen for thanksgiving day. Reinforcers are usually most effective following a specific activity. For example, you might include one reinforcer for meal preparation, one for the dinner, a reinforcer for appropriate behavior and social skills during dinner, one for cleaning up or activities after dinner and one for getting ready for bed. 
5.  Discuss what behavior is expected during the day, at dinner and after dinner. 
6.  Engage your child in preparing the meal and setting the table or cleaning up. If they do not have many of these skills then even just wiping the table, stirring the ingredients for the pie or putting away his dish are excellent activities. 
7.  During the meal try not to give your child the reinforcer for social skills and good behavior until he is good for specified period of time or specific behavior. For example, the parent can give him access to the ipod only after he has shared a story or conversation, ate all his meal and sat nicely until the dinner is finished then give him the ipod and desert!! Try to state why the child earned access to the game or other reinforcers so that it is very clear to him what he has to do.
8.  A trial run of a dinner prior to thanksgiving day might be good practice so that all the behaviors and reinforcers are familiar to the child!
In summary, prevention (through scheduling of activities, scheduling reinforcers, practicing good dinner behavior and making sure the child understands what the dinner activities) will be will be more likely lead to wonderful memories of a fun thanksgiving holiday with your family.

Planning a birthday party for a child it is important to analyze your child and decide what his/her reinforcers are. If you spend money on something that is not reinforcing the party may end in tears!  Some children enjoy social attention, some enjoy tangible objects and some enjoy sensory stimulation.


Attention focused partiesIf your child enjoys attention the focus of the party might be on the child and giving him/her attention. For example, games that focus on the child, songs that focus on the birthday child, favorite foods the child likes.  Finally, if a child likes attention a smaller number of guests might be considered so that it is easier focus on the birthday child. If there are alot of children the attention might be diverted to other kids more easily. 

Tangible reinforcers- If your child enjoys tangible reinforcers then the most important things are the actual objects such as gifts, food or activities that he/she likes.  Make sure these items are visible and remind the child that they will be opened or available during the party!  
Sensory reinforcement- If your child likes sensory reinforcement then focus on the sounds perhaps nice music will lead to a more enjoyable experience for the child. Frequently hugging or patting him/her on the back will be crucial if that is what they enjoy. Also, gifts should be geared towards sensory experience of sound or vibration or other tactile stimulation. 


Finally, these reinforcing items should be available contingent on good behavior otherwise the child might spend the whole party playing a computer game and miss the other activities. The other advantage of knowing what types of things are reinforcing to your child is that inappropriate behavior such as crying or tantrums can be avoided by providing items or activities they really enjoy after the child has shown the enthusiasm and smiles and appropriate behavior you want for them at their birthday party. If the party is enjoyable they will have happy memories in the future of their birthday parties and you!

The latest trend is to purchase an iPad or computer and assume that this will teach your child everything!
There are three important things to note about the use of an electronic device.

First, the computer itself does not teach your child. If the software has reinforcers built into the games or activities that you purchased then this might work. However, if your child does not like the particular reinforcer in the program then the child will not learn. For example, if your child likes music and the reinforcer in the game is music delivered for a correct response then the child will not learn.  Before purchasing a game it is important to look at the game and see if the reinforcers are included.

Secondly, it should be noted that many games are specifically designed to include reinforcers and many are not.  Some are based on psychological research including games such as those developed by "Headsprout" ( recently purchased  by another company) and many others. Parents should read and look at the information about the games to see if they are based on research or psychological principles such as reinforcement. 

Third, parents should also consider the skills taught by the electronic device. Are these skills you want your child to learn. There are games to learn most anything such as spelling, reading, self-care skills, morals, social skills and much more.  I contrast it should be noted that children might model some behavior in games and there is such discussion and research that indicates that some aggression can be learned from modeling of television or games. This should be considered in your purchase of a game. Games your children might like might have some benefits and some deficits in their affect on your child's' behavior. All of these factors should be weighed and considered before purchasing a device and programs for your child. 

Aggression is often a targeted behavior problem for therapist. It is a great idea to try to stop the aggression in the beginning as soon as precursor events occur. For example, some ways to relax are listed below.
1.  Listening to music
2. going in the bedroom or to a quiet area to relax a few minutes
3. Counting to ten.
4.  Designing some positive statements to say to themselves when they start to become aggitated such as " that is no problem!" 
5.  Using some kind of object to hold such as a sensory ball to distract from the aggitation.
6.  Getting a drink of cool water or tea to relax.
7. Saying calm reasuring things to the other person in the room or complimenting them.
8. reading a magazine
9. Engage in some deep breathing exercises
10. Engage in some relaxing deep muscle exercises to calm down. 

In choosing which exercises to work on first more frequently in a child with poor motor skills and aspirer or autism one should think about the functional skill deficits of the child. If a child is having difficulty using a fork or spoon then sports or leisure activities that emphasize the hands may be beneficial since you will be strengthening these muscles and movements.  Exercises that stress the lower body are also beneficial but if the priority is to develop self-care skills that require more dexterity then he as the fine motor movements should be emphasized. Some leisure activities such as using an iPad may also improve fine motor skills. 

Finally, one should also consider forks or spoons for example that are easier for the child with motor problems to use. Considering the selection of equipment and leisure or sports activities can be important in promotion of more rapid learning of self-care and daily living skills in children with both motor and Autism or  Attention problems. 

Communication skills are often limited in children with autism. There are many things to consider using in improving you childs communication skills. First make sure that the child has the appropriate physical throat and ears to communicate this can be achieved through a complete physical examination. This typically  includes brain tests such as EKG, otologist or ENT evaluations, occupational evaluation of swallowing, genetic testing and hearing tests. Once this is done and any medical recommendations are made the behavioral intervention will be even more effective since the child will have the ability hopefully to respond more appropriately to stimuli presented to the child.  

Communication skills should begin with simple names of items that the child wants and then add more words to functional communication skills. The training should be done informally throughout the day in order to assure the most trials for learning possible. Although if time permits  and intensive session alone might be done once a day. Parents or caregivers should constantly talk and interact with the child so that they model and reinforce appropriate communication more frequently. A parent might use different tones of voice or a hearing aide device might be needed if the child hears certain tones better than others. Parents or caregivers should try to be very close to the child when speaking, speak clearly and offer a reinforcer for any request made of the child. These tips will help to increase communication skills and the likelihood that the child will be able to communicate with others throughout hisl life. 

Children with special needs such ADHD or autism spectrum disorder often are not in touch with long term contingencies.  Focusing the childs attention on long term contingencies can lead to big improvements in behavior and academic performance.  Some tips in focusing on the future are discussed below. When meeting with teachers it is helpful to focus on the potential of your child such as intelligence or social skills. Secondly, the parents can focus on the future by discussing the future with the child. For example, the parent might discuss what car, job, spouse, kids, money or job title they might want when they grow up. This should be done on a regular basis hopefull daily or weekly.  Thirdly, the parent might go onto the computer and look at people in jobs or careers the child might like, look at cars they might purchase or computer equipment.  Focussing on long term goals will focus their attention on the future.